Thackley Workhouse

Thackley Workhouse

As a teenager, I lived with my parents on Jowett Park Crescent, (Thackley)  and later once I married, I moved to 59 Windhill Old Road. At the back of my parent’s house was a lovely old stone cottage. Always having a fascination with old houses, I investigated, and I found that this house was once the Thackley Workhouse.

Built around 1765 at a cost of £104, 10s 1d. Thackley Workhouse was built on Windhill Old Road. A stable was added in 1790 with an additional cost of £34 17s 10d. At the beginning of the twentieth century this by then ‘quaint old cottage’ was considered to be an object of interest and curiosity. Described as low and depressing with small windows some with iron grills on them.

The workhouse was built around three sides of a large courtyard, the fourth side surrounded by a high wall, behind which is a fairly extensive garden. (Must have been where Jowett Park Crescent is now) This garden was considered to be too cheerful a sight for miserable paupers. The workhouse was divided into cottages and at the time the workhouse master wanted to portray an image of it been inhabited by prosperous working people whilst happy children played in the courtyard. The reality was somewhat different.

The North Bierley Union was responsible for Thackley Workhouse and was founded in 1848. Thackley Workhouse was taken over by a board of guardians (as was the custom at this time), but on 11^th March 1852. The board received a scathing report from a local government inspector Mr Farnell, who condemned the building, stating that ‘the building was a most imperfect structure,’ which did not match the requirements expected of a well-conducted workhouse. There wasn’t a single bath on the premises. Arrangements for the sick were inadequate with paupers having to attend to the sick themselves, bedding and clothing were in short supply, and the inmates both children and adults had no shoes. The overall place was dirty, the report further concluded.

Thackley Workhouse was calculated to hold 100 people and usually reached this capacity. The house was quite inadequate for the requirements of the new union. Mr Farnell begged the board to consider building a new workhouse so that the poor who had no other shelter would be lodged as they deserved, the idle and destitute would be treated with the inbuilt discipline of the workhouse. The helpless children would be educated and the sick and poor lodged apart from the healthy and women of good character set apart from the immoral and the depraved.

(Credit P Higginbotham)

Nevertheless, despite accepting the inspector’s recommendations the board continued to use Thackley (Known as Idle Workhouse)  until 1855, when North Bierley Union acquired a site at Calverley, unfortunately, these plans were abandoned as there was insufficient water supply to the premises. A year later a purpose-built workhouse was erected at Clayton Heights designed to hold 400 people. Due to its location, this site became very unpopular and deemed ‘The Siberia’ of the North Bierley Union.

In 1948, this workhouse was integrated into the NHS and renamed ‘Thornton View.’ This hospital closed in 1984, in 1991 it was sold for use as a private Muslim girls’ school. Many of the original buildings still stand today.

Thackley Workhouse still stands and is now a desirable private property. 

 

 

 (Credit P Higgibotham)

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Hey Up

Does thi know t'as bin yonks since I wrote on 'ere bin busy.

Come across a smashin site on t' Farcebook called Straight up Yorkshire-spot on t'is got thir 'eads screwed on annall. Pissed me sen laffin. Carn't a' purr it better me sen.

SANTA IS A YORKSHIREMAN by Chris Burdon....

Santa is a Yorkshireman
Of this I'm fairly sure
I heard him tiptoe in my room
At roughly Ten to four

"I 'ope tha's fast asleep" he said
"Or tha'll get nowt my lad"

He smelled of Hi Karate
(Must av pinched it from my dad)
Just down stairs I'd left a treat
Santa loves a beer
He loves pork pies and single malt
That was Dad's idea

When I woke next morning
I ran down stairs to see
If Santa had been kind enough
To leave gifts under t'tree

He got our mam a Nightie
And a pair of china pigs
Our dad got socks and undies
And 200 park lane cigs

My sister got a Barbie
Sat on a plastic horse
A One Direction annual
Which she loved of course

When I unwrapped my parcels
My Yorkshire heart did sing
Each gift that Santa gave me
A truly wondrous thing

A flat cap for my noggin
A vest of finest string
The ferret keepers handbook
Each gift fit for a king

So thank you Santa thank you
You surely are a tyke
But can you please remember
Next year I'd like a bike

What Thissen.....

Tyke Dictionary

1. “Be reight.” – I’m so desperately sorry to hear of the awful time you’re going through, but I have faith and hope that things will sort themselves out.

2. “‘Ey up!” – How the devil are you, old friend?
3. “Yer brew’s mashin’.” – This exceedingly strong and exceptionally tasty cup of Yorkshire Tea will be with you shortly.
4. “It’s chuffin’ roastin’ out.” – It is March bank holiday and therefore I will not need my coat until October.
5. “Bagsy ‘avin a croggy!” – I’m now officially the first person to be allowed a ride on the back of your bicycle.
6. “‘Ow much?” – Do you really mean to tell me that I won’t get change from a tenner for this round?
7. “‘Eez int’bog.” – He’s visiting the lavatory at the present moment.
8. “That’s proper champion, that, lad.” – My dear child, I’ve frankly never been more proud of you.
9. “Gi’us a butty.” – Please may I have one of those delightful looking cheese-and-pickle sandwiches?
10. “Gi’us a chuddy.” – Please may I have some chewing gum? Those cheese-and-pickle sandwiches seem to have given me slightly putrid breath.
11. “Gi’or, yer too cack-‘anded.” – Look, just let me take over the preparation of this Yorkshire pudding mix, you’re frankly too clumsy to be trusted with it.
12. “I’m chuffed t’bits wi’ that.” – This is quite possibly the best news I’ve ever received.
13. “That ruddy whippet ‘as took me cap down snicket!” – I say, that darned stereotypical northern dog has taken off with my equally stereotypical choice of headgear down a narrow alleyway.
14. “Ahm fair t’middlin’.” – I’m not doing too badly, thanks.
15. “Ahm nobbut middlin’.” – I’m doing pretty badly, actually.
16. “‘E’s in fine fettle.” – He’s doing very well by all accounts – must have had a smashing trip to Skeggy.
17. “Tha’ knows.” – You understand, do you not?
18. “Tha’ll get a clip rahnd lug’oil if tha’ carries on like this.” – If you don’t stop with this fake Yorkshire accent nonsense, I’ll smack you in the head.
19. “Mind you visit yer nan this weekend, she’s getting reight mardy.” – Be sure to take the time to visit your grandma this weekend, she’s starting to get a bit annoyed with you.
20. “‘Appen ‘e’ll quit his mitherin’ if you buy ‘im a Landlord.” – Perhaps he’ll stop complaining so much if you get him a decent pint.
21. “Nah, ‘e’s allus mitherin’ about summat.” – That seems unlikely, he’s always complaining about something.
22. “Eeh, yer daft ha’peth.” – My god, you fool, you’ve made quite the mistake here.
23. “Stop nebbin’ in me diary, buggerlugs.” – Kindly stop prying into my private affairs, you idiot.
24. “Na’than thee, ‘ow’s tha’ lass?” – Why, hello, my friend, how the devil is your wife?
25. “Put wood in t’ole! Was tha’ born in a barn?” – Please shut the door. Where the dickens were you brought up that you think it’s OK to sit in a draft?
26. “Eeh, yer reight nesh.” – A draft? There’s no draft, you’re just a big southern softie who can’t handle a bit of cold.
27. “‘Ow do, my love?” – Why hello, m’lady.
28. “Tarra, ducky.” – I’m a bus driver/your grandmother/both, and I’m wishing you an affectionate farewell.
29. “There’s nowt s’queer as folk.” – People are truly, properly weird.
30. “‘Owt’s better than nowt.” – Well, it’s not quite the Sean Bean life-sized cutout I was hoping for, but I suppose this poster of him will do.
31. “‘E’s neither use nor ornament.” – That gentlemen serves quite literally no purpose on this earth.
32. “Where there’s muck, there’s brass.” – One can make a small fortune if one is willing to engage in dirty work.
33. “Did I ‘eckers like!” – Did I bunk off work to buy Def Leppard tour tickets? My god, of course not!
34. “Near as makes n’ matter.” – Well, it’s not quite a Yorkshire pudding of my mother’s standard, but let’s be real: All Yorkshire puddings are a thing of joy, so let’s not quibble.
35. “Eeh I’ll go t’foot of stairs!” – It’s snowing in May? My goodness, I’m really quite surprised by this turn of events.
36. “Eez nobbutta babbi.” – He’s only a small child, leave him be.
37. “Think on, soft lad.” – You’ll come to remember my advice one day, you foolish boy.
38. “That’s a threp in’t steans.” – Ain’t that a kick in the nuts.
39. “Sit thissen dahn, tha’s bin laikin all day.” – Sit down, you’ve been out playing all day and frankly, that can be exhausting.
40. “Ah reckon nowt ter that.” – I don’t think much of your advice to stop drinking after five pints. What the devil is wrong with you?
41. “‘E’s on pot duty.” – He’s doing the dishes tonight.
42. “And ahm ‘appy as a pig in muck.” – And I’m really quite pleased about that.
43. “Eeh, it’s black o’er Will’s mother’s.” – It looks like it’s about to piss it down over there.
44. “Wang it o’er.” – Please toss me that chunk of Wensleydale so that I can gnaw on it like an animal.
45. “It’s like Blackpool bloody illuminations in ‘ere.” – I am your father and it is my responsibility to remind that you have left one light on in the house.
46. “‘E’s soft int’ed.” – That young man isn’t especially smart.
47. “If tha’s ‘ad beef dripping for dinner tha’s not ‘avin’ a chippy tea.” – If you had a delicious hot midday meal, you’re certainly not being treated to chips for your evening meal.
48. “Tha’ meks a better door than window.” – Please could you get out of the way of the television so I can finish watching Corrie, you careless lump?
49. “‘E’s a reight bobby dazzler.” – Alex Turner really scrubs up nicely when he’s in a suit, no?
50. “‘Supwier?” – What the heck is wrong with that woman?
51. “Tin tin tin.” – That giant rocket firework you were planning to detonate? It’s not in the designated tin.
52. “Eeh by gum!” – I’m from London and I think I’m pretty funny right now.

Yorkshire Pud's have bin sabotaged!

Nah t'day I were not impressed. Some silly beggar decided t' mek me lunch-some silly beggar frem 't' smoke

Nah what the 'ells all this abhat? Strewth-I'll go t' foot of arr stairs afoar I'll eat that!

Soome one need's a slap rhand 'ed fer this!

                                                                            Blitherin' Idiots!

The Yorkshire Manifesto.

Speyk Reyt thah nah's.

Eh bah gum, tha's one thing tha ger's reyt up mi nose, it's folk frem t' south reckon'in tha thi cahn't understand owt I sey. Kettle callin' pan black' methinks. I'm Yorkshire born an bred tha nah's an proud of it.

Thi move fren t'smoke buyin' up arr 'ouses and think thi nah it'all. Well ler mi tell ya summat-tha' all sound's like Ray Winstone ti me luv, or Kathy bloom' Burke so gerr over thissen. And If ya dahn't like way we speyk in God's own country then pack thissen back t' smoke wit Jamaycans where thi belon'. Can ya Adam n Eve it!

All sound like bloody rappers thi do nah frem't smoke...bad uns at that. Thi needs to lissen ti' thissen. Hurts thi lugoiles thah do. Anyhow I'm frem t' North n proud of it. An while wi' r on't subject its BATH not bloomin' BARTH..........Sort it owt ya daft ayepaths!

I'm Yorkshire Born n bread

Stron in't arm

but nah' moore

Am I weak

in't' 'ead.

Aye thah love's thi grub.

'Oss & Farrier- will be in there shortly.

Daft stuff Folk do in Yorkshire

A couple of things you need to know in Yorkshire if visiting' t Doctor or 't Chemist

Thah's one good thing abaht livin' in God's own country-and that is everyon is as mad as a box o' frogs. Mi an arr Bert wah walking around tahn and came across some signs plastered all oeer t' walls-I rest mi case as Judge Joody would sey!

Nah I know folk round 'ere arr a bit dense but a bloody wall?


Then thah's this one.

This is where mi best mate Norma lives-salt o' thi earth shi is-but slack well shi cahn't 'elp it-shi wor a deprived child.

An this wor on't door of Oss n Farrier-come on gerr your keks on-wi need some ale!

Yorkshire Day

Yorkshire Day.

New 'Arr cut.

Time I 'ad mi Arr cut, after them dahnsizers, kept staring at mi barnett like I wor Ken Dodds love bairn or summat!

So I though't i'd ave a word w it' arr dresser dahn at Jane Hair's-Bloody Jane Hair's meks me laff-The bloody Bronte woman only came to t' village once, nah thah's bloody shops all over t' place wi' Bronte name on-evn't bloody travel agent t's called Wuthering Flights-stupid 'ts all got nah.

Anyhow back to mi arr- need t' change t' style annall-a restyle-a 'bit like them folk frem t' south av their arr like, flared aht' at sides -some of 'em ' ave ther arr two colours-thought we'd ad an influx o' badgers wen I fast saw 'em-peed misenn laffin' I did.

Anyhow, I took plunge and went to Jane 'Arrs- a young lass it wor weshed mi arr an covered it in't conditioner smelt grand annall,  Nice lass she'd sin me in't 'oss n farrier' on a Friday nite. Laffed she did dernt nah why.

'Arr you 'avin' a do' she asked as she shuvved mi' ed upside dahn-nearly swall'd mi knashers she 'ad 'ands like bloody shovells. Started to blah dry mi arr she did runnin' her fingers through mi arr wit' force of an 'amster on rollerskates. Well wen shi finally let me av a luk- well she must 'av sin luk on mi face'

' I'll brush it a aht-mek it stick aht a bit better.'

Nah word of a lie it wor stuk out like that bloody Kanye bloke's missus's arse!

'Dah't worry,' she sed-'I'll be alreet-I'll pur rollers on'

So she stuck pur rollers in mi arr, an 'arr-net on mi 'ed n stuck mi under t' drier.

' Do yer look like a magazine' she holled' ' or shall I mek a brew'

Wor is it wi 'arr dressers why do they wait t'll you cahn't hear 'em before they talk to you?

Alfway thru reading abaht some shite in tek a break, mi 'ed started to burn, thort id best shout.

' It's too bloody wahrm under 'ere' tryin' to move bloody space-invader machine frem off mi 'ed.

'Can you cum n turn it dahn!'- no response- talking to one of them posh folk frem up't hill-sahned like she'd swalled a gob full of peppledash.

Nowt 'appened, hotter n hotter i wor gerrin' till lass came and gawped at mi.

'Yer almost done nah 'she sed'

'almost done,' she said

'I thowt ad' set on't fire- thawt you wah mekin a re run o't Jacko in't Pepsi advert.'

She took no notice, just blah dried mi arr aht a bit more,

'Stop faffin abhat will ya,' I said, losin' mi' patience.

'Der you want some lacquer on it' as she reached for t' bottle anyhow, a bottle o t' lacquer the size of an exocet bloody missile.

Mi 'edd wah soar wi all 'fussin, as I lukked in't mirror -

Nah bloody wahnder, they called it Jane Arr's I lukked like I'd just bin dragged frem a wutherin' height. Or a badgers back side.

Wor a waste o money mi arr lukked better  afoar I started.

Apples & Pears

Does thi nah’ I’m a bit niffed.

Me an arr Norah went t’ ‘oss n farrier for a couple o’ pints last nite and got stuck wi’ a couple of ‘em dahnsizers-nah I’m sorry but they all talk bollocks-din’t understand a bloody word they wor sayin’. Like bin in a bloody zoo it wah!

Lucinda n Piers thah wor called- nah what sort o’ names are them? -peein’ missen  laffin I wah.

Thought wi’d mek a bit of ‘n effort like so asked ‘em if thah’d settled int’ neighbourhood alreet-Well thi started gerrin a bit saucy  did’ t bloke kept askin’ mi if I’d like to go see ‘is ‘Arse’

                ‘Nah why do I wanna see your Arse I sed t’him-daft’sod if I wanna see an arse I’ve gor arr Bert’s arse at ome’.

Nah mam sed arr Norma, who reckons shi’s a bit smart like-He means house mam-do you want to go see his house.

Sem sort o’ perv if ya ask mi-Arse indeed-then he wor askin mi if, I’d bin dah’n ‘t smoke to see baked bean?

                ‘The Queen mam, have you been to London to see the Queen?'Smart ass is arr Norma-you’d nah think shi wor one o’mine

‘I think blokes bin smoking summat funny or bin on’t loopey juice arr summat’ putting ‘er in ‘er place. 

' Come dahn frem smoke and mek no bloody effort t’ fit in-!'

 ‘Ah look at your boat race,’ woman shouted at mi-‘Are you brahms and list’.

‘Yes she’s Elephant’s trunk,' sniggered bloke. Well I’d ‘ad abaht enuff of this like-thort I was on another planet.

‘Come on Norma-grabbin’ her by t’ arm wir off I’m not sittin’ wi folk thah’ mek no bloody sense.

‘Nice to meet you-my china plate’ they shouted as we left-I just shook my ‘ed. Bloody go to foot of arr stairs ‘ what’s the world coming to 

'Mate mam, he meant mate.' Norma sighed.

Bradford City.

Well bye eck, arr lads have shown that suth’n  team  Chelsea how ‘t play ft’ball. Ahr Bert carn’t believe it. 2 bloody 4 wat score-Smashin’ result.

Tha’ll all have thr ‘edds dahn in't tahn will them frem ‘t smoke as they walk round than wi’ thr wax jackets and black labs-2-4 He he he. Tha’ll be proer maungie this mornin’ will’t dahn’sizers.

Had a bet on annall did ahr Bert won some dosh-so that’s me sorted wi’ a new frock fer mi ‘ollidays. Gonna go of somewhere f’t weekend somewhere nice like Brid or Filey, maybe gerr a caravan or digs. As t’be in Yorkshire,  as we ain’t forgot 'Wahrs o' t'

Roases so Blackpool’s a no go. Suppose times come ter i' peace wi thir neighbours I mean ooeer seas nor bloody Lankishire.

Anyway, off dahn town nah, t’ annoy them suth'n- fowk-

Bradford City, Bradford City.

Pablo Escabar works in Primark

                               norr exactly Pablo Escabar wah 'e


Ow do-

Well I'll go t' foot of arr stairs-been yonks since I wrote owt on 'err. I 'ave been too busy graftin.' Aye got myssen a job at Primark-It's not fantastic but it keeps me in tanfastic an arr Bert in Pigeon food, 'ees saving up fer a new ferrett anall, as he clumped last un, as it went wrong way dahn 'is kegs an nearly bit off his crown jewels, well it' wont ave 'ad to chew reet 'ard rusty is bits arr to say 't least.

Primark, its nowt special, started tekin' giros they 'ave nah, gone dahn a treat annal-mind ya they 'ave 'ad to stock more change like, only so much stuff ya can buy from Primark with a twenty pound giro-even if it dah's come in fourteen carrier bags.

T'gaffers alrite-a bit odd like but thah's nowt wrong wi 'him really-a bit of a shady past but ant wi all-a bit of a Lance Armstrong-ya knowworra I mean, like 'im wi'drugs'-dern't think 'e got caught tha used to sell 'em rahn back o't market-bought 'imself a car wi' it 'e did-a morris minor smashin' car.-Thought i dern't remember 'im he did wen I came f't interview, but 'e soon did wen I showed' 'im pics of 'im an arr Norma in't back of't Morris Minor- smoking like a mexican bandit, 'e soon remembered then though-daft sod-I wah reet chuffed-got myssen a job and 'e got me to keep mi trap shut-well fer nah.

Tha's a few scruffy sods work 'ere annal-I've seen pigeons more hygenic than some of 'em pong t' place aht, and some of 'em you cahn't see 'em at all got them black veils on you need 'piss'n x ray specks to get a response from 'em darf vader I call 'em, like makin' a conversation with a pengiuin's arse-still it's what they believe in up t' them I suppose.

Still gerrin' all them dahnzizers in -thinkin' there in 'arvey pricks or worra' eva tha' call that posh shop.Cahn't understand a blood word they say-In they come askin' if they do stuff in different colours-I take no crap- tell 'em straight I do.
`No we fookin dern't its fookin Primark for Foots sake-it's all shite-different coulours my arse-if you cahn't see it on 't shelf we an't gorr it-god they are so bloody demanding.! 

One o 'em turned thah nose up at me mate Shell-came in fer a quick natta-gorra a bit of a drink problem she 'as -but 'she cah'nt 'elp it-as t' 'ave a bottle in her bag at all times-'tried t' 'elp 'err loads o times-even bought 'er a copy of Amy Winehouse Rehab-still did na' bloody good-Still no need t' turn ya nose up like them 'oorays do. 'Excooose me young lady-one of 'em yells wen she can see I wah talkin to mi mate-needs t' go to fooking Specsavers if ya ask me-' That woman you are talking to is drinking in public,' Well blow mi over wi' a feather-wah if she is I told 'err-anyhow she aint' in public she sticks 'er ed in' t carrier bag t' pour it an, she's gorra cup.'-stuck up swine.

Annhow t'gaffer came sniffin' round soon scappered though when I started whistling Lois Armstrong-an flashin pictures of 'is Morris Minor abaht wi' im an arr Norma smoking weed in't back o' it like a fookin' 'errin factory- he wah off quicker than' a fat kid chasin' mr Wippy he wah-thick sod!

Yorkshire Airlines

Does thah no-wha' a set o numpties there are at Yeadon Airport (Leeds Bradford International Airport) wun't let mi tek mi pidgeon on board't plane. Off t 'Benidorm fer't week wah-mi n arr Bert.

Trouble started as sen as wi got there.
'Alrite love,' said attendn't with a face so colourful leeked like she'd painted it 'er sen with  wax crayons.

'Ave you got yer boarding card, she mouthed, makin' t sign of a card with her 'and as if we wah dense'

'Ya can't tek that,' she sed, pointing t' box wi't pidgeon init.

'Wassup wi' it we're off pidgeon racing?' sed arr Bert-

'T's mi prize bird,well sept fer her like,' he sed, digging me in't ribs.

'Daft aypath,'

'Well she were 'avin' none of it, wah Rosie flight attendent,'

'It's not coming on 'ere, its a danger t' other passengers!'

Well that were it, we had to let her go. Still wi a bit o look she'll find err sen in Benidorm for we are. Can fly like clappers that bird. 

Served grand bangers an' mash on't flight on all-Roll on Benidorm, we'll teach them Spanish lot a thing or to.Cos If there not frem Yorkshire they'll be stupido.