Thah’s sick Ah’m s o this middle aged spread. T’s time fer me to do summat a’baht it. In’t new year , am off on’t diet, na’h moor puddin’ ner cakes fer me.
Nah thah’s kiddin’ thissen, thah likes thah grub to much, nah if thah’s serious abah’t loisin sum weight, t’ proper road is ter goa on a fast, thi mud as weall do t’job reight. Thah’s gonna gi’ up suppin annawl, thah’s why I’ ‘av’ gorra a bit o’ a middle aged spread, but t’flab’s gerrin’ varry unsightly ter see, t’as gorra go, thah’s ner more t’ be sed.
A thort a mite tek up jogging, but I denr’t see a’s got thi’ stamina fer it. p’raps ride on ‘t bike, or goa dahn baths fer a swim ,Tha’ll soon loose a few pahnd , after fost mile o’ too?
A knaw t’s nah gawin’ be easy, A’ll get back inta trim, mite, join t’ gym, but a’ knows tha’ll end up paggered , or skint.
T’s a long way off ‘till , thi meks a start, so thi will carry on, fer nah. Cos I am garrin on a bit, and resolutions are med to b’ broken.
